all i do is sit around and eat and be sad im basically a more annoying version of a plant
(via isolemnly-swe4r)
all i do is sit around and eat and be sad im basically a more annoying version of a plant
(via isolemnly-swe4r)
Sometimes i talk in song lyrics and my friends don’t even notice
sometimes I talk in Mean Girls quotes and no one notices
Sometimes I talk and nobody notices
At first it was funny but then it got kind of sad
Just like my social life
(Source: brendonboredurie, via shrwood2)
May or may not have sent a text saying “what colour are your eyebrows” tonight. Whatever, he didn’t even respond.
I’m not sexually frustrated, I’m sexually FURIOUS *punches hole in wall*
*has angry sex with the hole*
Thrift Shop 8bit (x)
Macklemoredude this sounds like really bad ass boss music holy shit??
wow
whoops my hand slipped
(via afuckinghilariousbitch)
Ellen: Do you know the sex of the child?
Tina: We decided we are going to wait. We’re going to find out…never.
Ellen: Ok.
Tina: Not even after it’s born.
Ellen: Not even after it’s born?
Tina: I’m just going to see what it chooses to wear to prom.
Ellen: Give it time to figure it out. Good for you.
All the awards.
Parenting: A+
(Source: alfonsodisparioso, via afuckinghilariousbitch)
This guy at my school shows up every day with like a fake wolf tail clipped to his back belt loop, and I always see him running from class to class and jumping over things and he looks so happy to exist and sometimes he brings a lil wolf puppet with him and he makes it run along next to him on the strings
I’m just like u go wolf kid live ur dreams
(via afuckinghilariousbitch)
You really only understand how drunk you are when you’re peeing
(Source: glial, via afuckinghilariousbitch)